"so you're home for good now?"

the title was the first question that my little 5-year-old niece asked me on monday night when i saw her for the first time. she wanted to know if i was home for good or going back to peru. here is how the little conversation went:

z: are you home for good?

me: yes. i'm living at home now, i won't be going back to peru.

z: so you'll be here forever and ever? until you die?

me: sort of.

((big hug))

of course i must admit that i simplified things a bit when i responded to her. i know that i'm not going to be here forever and ever until i die. and i know that some day i'll be going back to peru, but for now, i'm home. and home is a wonderful place to be.

everything at home seems to have changed, but it still feels familiar and comforting. my house actually feels smaller, or i feel bigger. maybe it's me that changed. things around here have changed as well: we have a new ceiling fan in the kitchen, they finally paved the road through downtown ipswich so now it's not a crazy game of avoid-the-potholes, there is a new shelf in the garage, there are curtains in the bathroom, etc. but there are some things that will never change that bring so much comfort: the way the heat smells when it kicks on in the middle of the night, the squeaky floors, skim milk from richardson's farm, the way my sister and i can always find something to laugh about, the way the sanctuary smells at church, etc.

but of course feelings are mixed and it is strange to finally be home. to know that i won't wake up in lima, that i won't take micro number 35 to la católica, and that i won't see be meeting up with any of my friends for lunch. peru has been my life for the past ten months and it's is all about to change. big CHANGE. nothing will ever be the same again. i am not the same person that i was when i boarded the plane on february 25th. i'm still unpacking and figuring out what this whole last year has meant to me. how it has changed me, how it is changing me.

but just because something is over does not mean that it's gone. i'm not about to put perú in a box, close it and stuff it in my closet. i can't. it's become a part of me. i'm not exactly sure how, but i'm sure of it. and i'm going to carry it with me forever. the friendships. the lessons learned. the adventures. the things learned about me and about my God, the way He brought me through it all.

so, what is next? that is the big question. christmas is coming, then in january i will be returning to tijuana, mexico to la casa de la esperanza orphanage with mexico outreach, then starts my last semester at gordon college. and after that, who knows? but it's alright. i'm just taking it one day at a time. remembering where i've been, where i am and trying to figure out where i'm going. step by step, day by day. i'll figure it out soon enough, and at just the right time. that seems to be the way He works.

la cordillera de los andes

[enanitos verdes]

quién te ha visto, quién te ve

en la cordillera de los andes

nunca me dejas de sorprender.

viento blanco que más da

que por mí pueden pasar las horas

quiero estar contigo un tiempo más.

y así podrán pasar los años

y yo tomar mil direcciones

sé que he dejado un mundo atrás

siguiendo siempre un ideal

como un valiente cazador de las estrellas.

se vive la libertad.

se siente la libertad.

te envuelve la magia del lugar.

quién te ha visto, quién te ve

en la cordillera de los andes

nunca me dejas de sorprender.

viento blanco que más da

que por mí pueden pasar las horas

quiero estar aquí un tiempo más.

hay una nube pasajera

tocando los picos nevados

sé que he dejado un mundo atrás

siguiendo siempre un ideal

como un valiente cazador de las estrellas.

se vive la libertad.

se siente la libertad.

te envuelve la magia del lugar.

(rough translation)

who have you seen, who sees you

in the andes mountain range

you never cease to surprise me.

white wind, what more can you give,

that for me the hours can pass by

i want to be with you a bit longer.

and this is how the years will pass

and i'll make a thousand decisions

i know that i've left a world behind

always following an ideal

like a brave hunter of the stars.

one can live the freedom.

one can feel the freedom.

the magic of this place surrounds you.

who have you seen, who sees you

in the andes mountain range

you never cease to surprise me.

white wind, what more can you give,

that for me the hours can pass by

i want to be here a bit longer.

there is a passing cloud

touching the snowy peaks

i know that i've left a world behind

always following an ideal

like a brave hunter of the stars.

one can live the freedom.

one can feel the freedom.

the magic of this place surrounds you.

the internet.

i think the internet is pretty cool. and since being here in peru it has been extra cool. you see throughout my day to day living i come up with a lot of questions. there are just some random things that i wonder about. when i'm in the states i usually simply send a little text message to my good friend nick, because he has a lot of useful, yet random, knowledge. i'm pretty sure that he saved my life about a year ago when he convinced me to heed the warning and not put my non-microwavable bowl in the microwave. unfortunately i am unable to send a quick little message to him for all my silly little questions. therefore i have turned to the internet for random knowledge. and it has been very good to me. everything from which side of my nose should i pierce? to are you supposed to floss before or after brushing? to how to apply perfume. pretty cool if you ask me.

now of course there is a dark side to the internet. for every useful bit of information there is also some real garbage out there. and stupid things too. things that make you wonder what on earth the person who posted it was thinking. things like the entire bible translated into lolcat speak. yes, it does exist. honestly? what is this world coming to?

but all in all i'm a fan of the internet. seeing as it allows me to "have the world at my fingertips".

things i like about peru.

i like its beautiful coastline.

i like its attempts at english translations.

i like its silly ice cream sundaes.

i like its natural beauty.

i like its history.

i like its food products with other meanings in english.

i like its beautiful children.

i like its colors.

i like its inca kola.

i like its yogurt.

i like its people.

i like its graffiti.

i like its bread section in the grocery store.

i like its obsession with limes.

i am so very thankful.

I missed Thanksgiving with my family yesterday.

But I did get to spend it with my best friends here in Peru.

On Monday I made a video of things that I'm thankful for:

Giving Thanks.

(And I just realized that I misspelled the title of the video. oops.)

[I'll be home in sixteen days]

making people a priority.

wednesday night here in lima. next week will be my last week of classes at la católica. my year abroad is quickly coming to an end and i’m looking forward to going home. to being around family and friends and snow and christmas. at the same time i know it will be difficult to leave and say goodbye. how does one say goodbye to a place? especially a place like peru that has become so much a part of me? i guess i’ll just have to figure it out as i go. but for now i’ll just enjoy my time and listen to christmas music and imagine that its snowing outside and i’m sitting by my fire place snuggled up in the big comfy leather chair watching “dancing with the stars” or “the amazing race” with my mom ... alright, enough imagining. let me tell you about last weekend.

last weekend was really great. amelia and i took a 13 hour bus ride up to a city called chiclayo on the northern coast of peru. our main purpose of the trip was to visit my compassion sponsorship child, but we did a lot more than that. we told our friends here at la católica that we were going to chiclayo and it just so happened that one of them is from there. so he put us in contact with people from cbu-chiclayo. we met up with them on friday night and they took care of us. we stayed in one of their rooms because he was going away for the weekend. they showed us around the city and took us to various historical sites. it was so much fun! i don't know why we didn't do the whole meet-up-with-cbu-people while traveling for our previous trips. but now we know.

i don't think that words can convey how nice these people are. they basically just dropped their plans and spent the weekend with two random american girls. it really impressed us and we were truly touched by their kindness. at one point amelia and I were sort of debriefing and talking and trying to figure out what was it that made them so nice. we realized that they made people and relationships a priority. i felt like i was important, they asked me questions, wanted to know about me, told me i spoke spanish well, and laughed with me (sometimes at me, but that's alright). after just two days i feel like we're friends. the kind of friends that you can count on to help you out when you need a tour guide, or a place to sleep or different blankets that don't make amelia's eyes blister (yes, there were some pretty interesting moments of the trip).

so i guess you can say that i’ve been inspired by the wonderful people that i met in Chiclayo – inspired to make people a priority. because i think that is what jesus was and is all about. that’s why he hung out with tax collectors, and talked to the samaritan woman at the well. people were important to him, like the most important thing ever. i mean why else would he leave heaven to live on this earth and then die on the cross? because people, humanity is his priority. he thinks we are important, he thinks i am important. so i want to start living in such a way that people are my priority. that i make others feel important, with the hope that they come to realize that they do matter, not only to me, but to the creator of the universe.

// rosa and i // with our new friends from cbu chiclayo // drinking chica de jora en poto - a fermented corn drink served in a carved out pumpkin // me and amelia in front of the museum of señor de sipán // on the longest balcony in south america // amelia and i with raquel and daniel - our two wonderful tourguides - at the pirámides de túcume // jumping picture =) // a peruvian hairless dog - which i think are gross // cebiche! the typical dish of peru - raw fish "cooked" in lime juice served with corn and sweet potato (can you believe i eat that?) //

live and learn.

i'm living in lima.

and i'm learning a few things.

>>if a movie is still in theatres and you buy a copy of it in the black market, you are pretty much guaranteed to get a crappy version of someone sitting in the theatre filming it.

>>shakira's songs are way too catchy.

>>there is a section of the center of lima where you can buy puppies for pretty cheap.

>>either i'm smarter than i thought i was, or i'm getting some major gringo points on these assignments. (by the way, gringo points = when the professor has sympathy that you're a gringo and are taking classes in a language that is not your native tongue and therefore goes easy when grading assignments. maybe it's discriminatory, but it sure is appreciated.)

>>having chocolate in my room is a bad idea. (a delicious idea, but a very bad one.)

>>the field of linguistics still has not come to an agreement of what language is. a topic which seems pretty essential to define.

>>when crossing a large street, make sure you have enough time to make it all the way across before the light changes.

>>things aren't usually black or white. there is a whole lot of mixed gray area.

>>it's hard for me to get into the christmas spirit when it's warm enough to start wearing flip-flops.

>>there are no tropical storms (like hurricanes or things like that) that damage the city of lima because of the andes mountains.

>>when you log into the pucp website and click on a professor's name to send them an email, you're actually sending an email to the entire class.

>>i like pumpkin pie.